For a post titled Contractions on October 10th I wrote:
My feelings right this moment are identical to the pre-birth feelings I had when the others graced the world with their beings. It won’t be long now…
For a post titled Pushing on November 15th I wrote:
I am chronicling this to note my hardened and compartmentalized being. I am a changed person. I repeated to myself subconsciously and consciously dozens of times this morning: I don’t care.
Last week November 26th came and went without the slightest thought to the importance of the day. Perhaps the distraction came from the fact that we received Kaitlynn’s birth certificate with all the correct information. The importance of the date? It marked six months since we brought Kaitlynn home. Like the woman who spent hours in labor and pushed longer than she ever thought possible my arms lay loosely around my daughter’s form and I allow the corners of my lips to rise too exhausted to express anything grandiose. With trepidation I tell you that my body, soul and spirit are still in the recovery room. Spent. If I responded honestly to the old familiar “How are you?” that is what my answer would be. Spent.
See the seal? Official. See the birth date? December 16, 2007. Also official. See the parents names? They were taken straight off of her parents’ own birth certificates. The ‘padre’? DaRonn. The ‘madre’? Angie. See her name? All other previous information has been eradicated. Kaitlynn Glory Washington is the name her birth certificate will forever bear. This was not just a name change but a complete identity overhaul.
I wish, oh how I wish, that I could tell you we are finished. This birth certificate has to be legalized in three different offices in town before we can take it and the court adoption paper to the city of La Paz and do all the Stateside adoption stuff at the embassy. I am hoping for a speedy process of getting: her adoption recognized by the U.S. gov., her born abroad U.S. birth certificate and her U.S. passport.
Do I still feel that everyone who can should consider adopting? With all my heart.